The Revealing Science of GOD

Sometimes in this novel, the author will decide to give up the anagram shenanigans and use the actual name of a real person, place or thing in order to get his point across. This will only be in circumstances where the truth is actually stranger, or at least more interesting, than fiction. Where there is an example of something so pure and close to the idea I am looking to convey, presenting anything less than the truth would be pointless. As this is still essentially a work of fiction, I will not bother with actual in depth research, for that is beyond my scope of intent, and will be deemed unnecessary anyway in most cases. Jon Anderson and his once great band Yes will be one of these instances. Mick Jagger along with Keith Richards and the entire Rolling Stones will no doubt make an appearance soon enough as well.

If you have ever heard Jon Anderson speak in an interview, you will quickly come to realize that there is nothing “false” about his soprano like voice. This is just the way it is, and always has been. Jon was one of the pioneers of the early rock and roll “green” movement though he might not have realized it at the time when he started writing about the importance of roundabouts in and out the valley and the killing of whales. Two of my favorite institutions, and Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), both forbid the use or mention of politics of any kind. This is one of the many reasons that they each remain favorites, and I will respect this and not try to tread too deep into those dangerous and murky waters.

GOD has decided to adopt this wise philosophy, and chooses to avoid religion and politics most of the time, though it is tough to say if this is intentional. GOD sat literally stone faced as President Obama recently made a very even toned and unemotional Presidential Address on national television. He was to elaborate on the United States’ plans for the growing threat posed by the Islamic State of Syria or ISIS. Of course, even though the rest of the free world chooses to call them ISIS, President Obama refers to them as the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant or ISIL. It remains doubtful he is able to recite the definition of this acronym off the top of his head, let alone the meaning of Levant, consistently and certainly without the use of his teleprompter.

The Levant today encompasses Cyprus, Israel, Jordan, Lebanon, Palestine, and part of southern Turkey. This represents a rather large geographical area, so perhaps the President is accurate in using this terminology. At any rate, this organization of terror, the likes of which the World has rarely seen, had recently brutally behead two kidnapped American journalists and posted the video footage on Youtube. Their unmet demands were not all that outrageous by Arab Terrorist standards and I believe was either the release of one of their own being held in Guantanamo Bay or a few million dollars. The reason these demands were not met was because, once again, these terrorists did not listen to the simple rules of engagement laid down by the United States and other Civilized Nations years ago, and repeated ad nauseum since- “We do not negotiate with terrorists”.  It is at least this author’s sincere hope that this message will become clear one day, and that no one else be subjected to this ghoulish terror in the future. Sadly, I for one am less than confident that this will ever happen, but hope remains eternal.

For a few short months immediately following the terrorist attacks of 911, America came together and united in a way not seen since December of 1941 and the ensuing war years. This was the last time any country blatantly attacked us on our home soil and there were American flags on almost every lawn and patriotism was rampant. Most true and sincere Americans recall this fervent patriotism fondly and are somewhat saddened by the speed at which it passed and faded. Polls would show an unprecedented near 100% support of any type of proposed counter terrorism attack or even all out War, whether officially authorized by Congress or by Executive Order, even by President George W. Bush.

The week of September 7th, in this Year of Our Lord 2014, Fox News reported on a recent poll conducted of college students returning for the fall semester at George Washington University in Washington D.C. The videotaped question asked by a journalist from the Young America Foundation was “Do you know what anniversary our Country is commemorating this week and can you name one of the two American journalists recently beheaded by ISIS?” The answers of course, were 911 and either Steven Sotloff or James Foley, God rest their souls.

Now, I may be a bit jaded and skeptical, and this is not entirely without reason, but even I was a little shocked at the results. I would argue these were almost as horrifying as the ghastly beheading themselves. Only 6 out of 30 students polled, or 20%, were able to correctly identify the 13th anniversary of 911. A mere four (13.3%) could go on to name either Foley or Sotloff as the recent victims of unspeakable terrorist horror.

What is less surprising, 29 out of 30 (96.7%) of the same students polled had no trouble naming one or more celebrity affected by the nude photos recently leaked on the internet. Even the students themselves seemed just a little bit disgusted and ashamed upon reflection, but this was reportedly not long lived. 97.3% claimed to find almost instant relief by consuming the better part of a 12 pack of Miller Lite a few hours later.

While the President had been given a golden chance to buoy his sinking approval rating by issuing Americans a rousing and inspiring speech on the steps America would pursue to crush ISIS, he proceeded to squander the opportunity in a somewhat bizarre way. I give him a D+ and that is being generous. First of all, he said that it was America’s intention to “degrade” ISIS. This is not the first time he elected to use this word, and upon first hearing this, I thought it was a very poor choice, and possibly a mistake. When he reiterated and even emphasized the word in his Presidential address, it was clear he did infact wish to “degrade” these terrorists. Though admittedly better than his strategy outlined the week before where he simply stated “We don’t have one yet.”, The United States should not really be in the business of “degrading” any terrorist organization.

The definition of degrade means “to treat or regard someone or thing with contempt or disrespect”. This kind of assumes, at least to the majority of less than ideally educated Americans that includes just about everyone, that you had a modicum of respect for said person, place or thing to begin. This is clearly not the case with ISIS. In his defense, the President did go on to use the word “destroy” which would have been sufficient and to the point. Even the members of GOD, who all watched the speech together huddled in Mikies suite at the Carlton Ritz Hotel which was a very rare thing in itself, thought the President indeed lacked character and conviction in this matter.

The fact that Obama did not even mention US Marine and decorated combat soldier Sergeant Andrew Tahmooressi, went largely unnoticed by the members of GOD and most other Americans watching the speech.  Sgt. Tahmooressi had been held in a Tijuana Jail for for close to six months after possibly having one to many at the local saloon and making a critical, but allegedly honest, mistake of attempting to cross the border with a couple of legally US registered firearms.  The border crossing into Tijuana is similar to just about any major intersection or bridge found across the United States and is constantly under a state of construction and repair. Camera crews documented just how confusing the roadway was for motorists right after the incident happened, making it easy for anyone to see how Sgt. Tahmooressi could have made this simple error. Suspiciously, this confusing display of road cones, temporary concrete dividers, and traffic signs of questionable content and meaning were removed and restored shortly after the incident.

Americans typically show immense support for ANY veteran or active duty member of a given Branch of the United States Armed Services and their important causes. For some reason, the Mainstream Media, with the exception of Fox News (much to the left’s chagrin, IS mainstream these days) has not been reporting this story to the masses. This can be somewhat understood, as during the Summer of 2014, big stories of much greater importance have been hitting the wires at the same pace as a swarm of mosquitoes are drawn to the glow of a well placed bug zapper.

In one of the largest, blacks and other residents of Ferguson, Missouri were outraged, and took to the streets burning and looting after a white police officer allegedly shot and killed a defenseless young black man named Michael Brown.  The facts of the case are not very clear at the moment, but witnesses say Mr. Brown had provoked and attacked several officers before being put down. Video footage shows Michael angrily pushing and shoving a shopkeeper just prior to the incident.

Curiously and tragically, the races were reversed just two days after the mayhem had ignited in Ferguson. A young white man named Dillon Taylor was shot by a black police officer shortly after exiting a Salt Lake City 7-11 convenience store.  Unlike the Brown case, there are no reports indicating that this 20 year old and soon father-to-be had resisted arrest at all, and instead, the incident might just have been a tragic case of mistaken identity.  Also unlike Ferguson, there were no subsequent rioting, looting, mobs of protesters, and very little media coverage of the incident over the days that followed.  There would likewise be no sighting of members of the Congressional Black Caucus or self appointed civil rights group leaders such as the Reverend Al Sharpton to be found in Salt Lake City.

In addition to Revs. Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson, there were several other notable men and women of color who either personally attended Michael Brown’s funeral or decided to take to Twitter and other social media to express their condolences. U.S Attorney General Eric Holder was on the scene early in Ferguson to promise a Federal Investigation, which would hopefully revolutionize the way local police forces across America will operate in the future.  There was no plans to expand this Federal Investigation to Salt Lake City, at least none of which I am aware.

Fox News might not be as Fair and Balanced as they claim, but given the alternatives, they certainly deserve kudos for at least trying. It would actually benefit Fox News to be more Fair and Balanced and let leftwing proponents actually speak and get their points across before interrupting, or otherwise shouting over them, as so often happens. This would at least partially silence the critics. This is why GOD and this author chooses to watch Fox news. To paraphrase Graham Williams, “Fox News is not the best at what they do, they are the ONLY ones that do what they do.”  That is of course, the not so simple task of reporting the news including stories that ain’t exactly fit to print as deemed by the Mainstream Media.

The fact is that GOD does not enjoy politics or religion and remains quite ambivalent towards these subjects. Roger, due to his parents attempts to get him to a Catholic Church nearly every Sunday, no matter what part of the San Joaquin Valley they might be working, is the band member with the most amount of “old time Religion”. Despite the migrant nature of the family, he was able to make all of the important Sacraments, some multiple times including Holy Matrimony and the Anointing of the Sick. (note that WordPress spell check does not recognize sacrament or matrimony or Anointing so it too seems ambivalent towards religion).

Robbie is the only one known to get a little out of line and dabble in the world of politics, billionaires, and the Illuminati from time to time. This most Unholy Trinity operates in a shroud of mystery but make no doubt, Rules the World regardless.  Robbie has at least been seen hanging out with the occasional politician. Little known to fans, Robbie is a card carrying member of the Bohemian Club, an entity so secretive and powerful, that it only recently allowed even Wikipedia to make an entry describing the organization. This was of course created and edited by fellow members of the Bohemian Club, who coincidentally OWNs Wikipedia and 98.3%  of the entire World Wide Web. The entry, like many found on Wiki, only ever so gently describes their intents and purposes. The Truth, will likely never be revealed.

There has been some recent minor controversy surrounding so called “Revisionist History” involving what some might consider morally questionable or otherwise unpleasant and objectionable persons, places and things that for good or bad, are part of our Nation’s past. This is not at all a new phenomenon or limited to America. History has shown that many past “scholars” with dubious motives have distorted and emended history over the centuries. It seems that only now, there are small groups opposed to the practice and willing to go to certain lengths to voice these injustices and Preserve the Truth.  And I applaud them, as this is rightful and just. No matter how difficult it might be to swallow, or how much we do not like the message, regardless of how inconceivably cruel the tragedy, The Truth should be recorded and preserved as History.

Much of this controversy in the news today surrounds the teachings in our schools, from the elementary levels right on up and through Masters and Doctorate programs offered by many of the oldest and highly respected and prestigious Institutions of American Academia. Sadly, many of the opponents of the window dressing of History would be ignorant of what should be their most important foe.

The Internet.

The Internet has easily surpassed any form of reference or research tool previously and traditionally known to exist in a very short period of time. This is of course understandable, as it is much easier to go look at high resolution photographs of say, The Shroud of Turin on the good ole WWW, rather than get on an airplane and go visit the actual Shroud in the museum at Turin.  Some would argue that the Internet experience is even more valuable, because, as in this instance, the researcher might never have known there was such a thing as an antipope had he or she not glanced at the vast resources and information displayed in a Google search of The Shroud that took less than one minute.

The reason I previously ascribed the word “foe” to the The Internet and it’s sources is not really accurate. We all know that computers merely spit out data that is entered by humans. At least that is how it usually works. With History, at least as it stands now, it must be the case. History and all the anecdotes, references, perspective, in essence, everything that makes up History has to be entered into the Internet by human hands. This is accomplished either by humans or some variant or other man induced / created / and ultimately and most importantly; a process that is somehow reviewed and approved by expert peers means.

The more ostensibly obscure the facts and apparent significance, and make no mistake, History has many of these, the less credible the witnesses and other important references need to be. In short, the more arcane the subject, the more likely this seemingly meaningless subject or part of history will be required to escape any peer reviewed scrutiny unchallenged and wholly intact. This is the essence of the scientific process. It is as simple as that, scrutiny is very expensive and time consuming, so that resource will only be available on an “as needed” basis as far as History is concerned.

So here we have more than a few problems that arise when human beings alone are solely tasked with the enormous responsibility of accurately entering ALL of the History of Civilization and the World into a computer database known as The Internet. If I had to pick the most significant of these, the choice would be very difficult, but with some consideration, quickly becomes clear.  I would no doubt start with asking how humans or mankind would go about deciding which parts of History deserve scrutiny, preservation and truth or, more importantly, which do not?

Granted, most of the information in the vast public domain known as “common knowledge” are easily verified and the sources provided. What becomes very tricky indeed is when we are dealing with the much more immense amount of information that do not fall under this umbrella of “common knowledge”. This is where it is easy for the Internet, still in it’s infancy for sure, to become a major monkey on the back of Academia. For it is very difficult if not impossible to be able to foresee what parts of History will become or already are very important and worth preserving in a very pure and unadulterated state.

Even if we could agree on a way to sort this all out and decide what parts of History are important and deserving of scrutiny and what parts are not, we still have an enormous challenge ahead of us. All of our labors and good intents assume The Internet will act as an infallible vehicle of Truth for All Eternity. Once we complete and enter all of the verified History of World Civilization and Everything Else that Ever Happened into our database on The Internet, we have to assume that it will never be corrupted or altered in any way. Simple enough, right?

Most people are not aware that the entire Internet is backed up multiple times a day by Google and other large Internet archivists, mostly for monetary and other business reasons. For instance, if the shit really hit the fan (and it always does), the FBI or whoever really wanted to know, could verify the comments section of an article featured the website of Style Magazine on October 4, 2014. They would start by looking at the cached page of that website as it appeared on that very day. Yes, much to his chagrin, even though our geeky hero changed his Style Magazine user name and password long ago, computer forensics have no problem finding out what kind of damage Mr.” WangoTango227″ inflicted on that early fall day back in 2004.

In fact, since this blog is time stamped, it might be of help to note that I am typing this on September 16, 2014 in case ever goes down and I myself might need to research the Internet Archives for my own purposes. Few people question who owns, controls and monitors the numerous resources of The Internet that they browse on a daily basis. This is just the way the Illuminati intended things to be and the way they would like it to remain for the foreseeable future. The less you know the better.

Just like a good junkie, the only change the Illuminati likes is the kind in your pocket. They don’t even like that kind of change as it is kind of heavy and makes an annoying jingle jangle sound. Their plans to get rid of coin currency in all it’s forms are proceeding slower than expected. They will then melt all of these coins down, as they have with many guns and other metallic objects of desire (not to mention the twofer being weapons of opponents), adding them to their already tremendous stockpiles of precious and semi-precious metals. The Illuminati like twofers very much.

My description of the Illuminati might seem like I copied it out of an Ian Flemming novel. Rest assured, the primary intentions and goals are much different than those of the many protagonists and Organisations of Evil that can be sorted out only by the likes of James Bond. The Illuminati simply want to keep order, and ensure their continued preservation of wealth and power. These two forces must grow with as little disruption and opposition as possible. It really is that simple, but in the big scheme of the World and all of it’s idiosyncrasies, is of course quite complicated.

They would much prefer to use simple and quite legal means to achieve these goals rather than resort to warfare and much more costly and violent approaches, but have more than enough resources to get the desired result regardless. This rarely gets overly complicated, but one of their strongest foes, Time, is not one they have been able to defeat or beat back at all, really. They have created whole institutions, yet most take the form of very visible and large Corporations that operate under the healthy guise of Capitalism.

Other forms are a bit more vague, but equally powerful and purposeful. One of the largest and most powerful is known as the Federal Reserve. If asked the definition, most Americans would likely admit that they believe it is indeed a Federal or government owned and operated operation much like the United States Postal Service. It is not. They would also more than likely go on to insist that there are indeed large Reserves in the form of currency or precious metals like gold. This would also not be entirely accurate. The Federal Reserve is one of the Illuminati’s greatest successes and they have done a more than admirable job of keeping the details concerning stewardship and Reserves quite nebulous and unclear since it’s inception in 1913.

If were to go down, taking this blog with it, it would not be a surprise to me. It would likely be the result of the Illuminati, as they probably own wordpress and if they don’t, there are plans to either acquire or squash it. Whichever works out to be cheapest and easiest. The Illuminati do indeed search the Internet for the word illuminati everyday and they will no doubt come across this blog sooner rather than later if they have not done so already. I don’t have anything to worry about though, as my credibility is questionable, mostly due to my own actions and poor choices, but I have some reservations about that supposition.

If you think all of this sounds like nonsense, just try to research Michael Jackson and his published writings about the Illuminati that once appeared on his website not long before his highly controversial death. The Internet Archives have been altered indeed in this respect. There was no way the Illuminati were going to let a man of Michael Jackson’s celebrity and world recognized stature get away with that shit. It was a close call, and a lot more work than expected. In the final analysis, not even the severely sloppy and blotched work of former fellow Illuminati and Freemason member Dr. Conrad Murray could prevent them from succeeding.

This whole mess of course could have been prevented much earlier. The Illuminati’s original assassination attempt resulted in Michael badly burning his entire scalp in the early 80’s. Even though he was filming a TV commercial for Pepsi, (the official softdrink of the Illuminati at Bohemian Grove), this footage was not released until nearly 30 years later. Only after a Judge issued a subpoena for the footage as evidence in one of the countless Jackson lawsuits filed after his death was it released. Even then it was kept relatively quiet and has surprisingly few hits on Youtube. This fact alone is suspicious. The fact that Michael refused to perform at the Superbowl for Pepsi that year, resulting in Pepsi getting a little upset and cancelling his contract, makes it even more so.

To further add to this, few people remember that Michael again nearly died on stage in Munich in 1999. He fell almost 3 stories, and his Personal Assistant and others thought he had indeed died. In the end though, Doctor Conrad accomplished the deed, and spent only 2 or the 4 year sentence he received in the Los Angeles County Jail. He was released on “good behavior” and due to “prison overcrowding”. I wonder if the Illuminati will let him practice medicine again? For all I know, he already is. It doesn’t really matter anyway as he is set for life, and can always return to his Official Medical Doctor of the Freemasons position given to him in Texas.

Michael did his best to protect his children, having his daughter Paris and younger brother Prince Michael Jackson II cover their faces in a bizarre, Muslim like fervor. Despite Michael’s attempts and fatherly advice, Paris has been known to Tweet mysteriously vague riddles hinting at the existence of the Illuminati to her many followers. This is never a good idea. In breaking news published only 4 hours ago (September 17, 2014) indicates that she is pregnant at age sixteen.

In June of 2013, Paris unsuccessfully attempted suicide by ingesting 20 Motrin tablets and attempting to slice her wrists with a meat cleaver. Her mother, Debbie Rowe, said she had been suffering from depression and had “a lot going on” and was very upset about not being allowed to attend a Marilyn Manson concert. She was subsequently treated placed on a 5150 suicide watch for 72 hours. Following her release from hospital, she was sent to the curiously named “Diamond Ranch Academy” located not in Diamond Ranch or surrounding areas but in Hurricane, Utah. She would undergo a much needed and intensive “Real Life Transition Program” for the next couple weeks.

The astute student of Michael Jackson might ask “What about Michael’s older child, Michael Joseph Jackson Jr. AKA Prince Michael I?”  Well that is a fair question. He is using money donated by Donald Trump and other supporters of to produce a documentary of his father’s life called Remembering Michael. It will be interesting to see if there is any mention of the many obscure facets of Michael’s life beyond those we already know. I personally would have called it the Darker Side of Michael for a number of reasons but I digress.

If you need any further proof of the existence of the Illuminati, one only really need to look at the United States Government. Here you find examples too numerous and absurdly obvious to count. Americans have a very short memory, but most will recall Obama’s two Presidential campaigns, both centered on Change and Hope. Even his staunchest supporters have a very difficult time coming up with clear examples of either. The endless stonewalling and inaction observed in our Government is the brilliant master plan of the Illuminati. Keep the masses satisfied just enough to prevent Revolution and they will continue to gather as much power, money and influence to continue the cycle.

Before I start sounding like one of those ultra-paranoid right wing nutjobs portrayed on the TV show “Preppers”,  let me wrap this up. The point is that even the Internet is infallible to corruption and should be questioned and scrutinized. The challenge to prevent and combat revisionist history and preserve the Truth ultimately becomes the responsibility of the human race and more importantly, the individual. If you are reading this, that means YOU too are part of this movement, and do not underestimate the importance of even one person. Although it might seem very antiquated indeed, Books and written script might just remain the only accurate ways to record and preserve History. The illuminati is OK with these as they are usually easy to destroy and burn, but a copy or two almost always survives unlike when you erase and edit the Internet. Anyway, please take this responsibility seriously and welcome to the Camp, I guess you all know why we’re here?

{Editors note: It would be easy to stop here and start and fill another whole chapter with story of Robbie and “The Grove” but the segue provided above is too clever.} End editors note.

Bohemian Grove, or The Grove as we shall call it, is a self described “campground” encompassing some 2,700 acres in Monte Rio, California. Much of The Grove shall have to be “self described” as it is protected by armed security personnel 365 days of the year, every year. Furthermore, membership in the Bohemian Club, the owners of The Grove, requires a pledge similar to those muttered in numerous moldy smelling church basement meetings of AA across America and the World. “What members SAY in The Grove, STAYS in the Grove.”  Unlike AA, however, this pledge is taken seriously and, as a result, there are few places in the United States that share a level of seclusion and stealth to rival that of The Grove. Camp David and the true CIA Headquarters (wherever that might be) be come to mind.

Nestled in the towering Redwoods of beautiful and uber expensive Sonoma County, the Bohemian Club has seized a couple of opportunities and gradually purchased and added parcels of land over the last century or so since shortly after their inception in 1870. In addition to the locked and guarded gates and entrances, there are fairly state of the art security cameras mounted in strategic locations throughout The Grove. The few visitors that have chanced on reporting their observations to Non-Members, claim that it is not unusual to see cables and wires running in odd places, even up and into the giant Redwoods themselves. These feed numerous video surveillance equipped guard shacks located throughout the property.

The most impressive feature of this otherwise humble “summer camp for adults” is the giant statue of Moloch the Owl. This dramatic 40′ tall centerpiece of the camp stage, perches across from a man made lake and overlooks the center of the Grove. Other than a few other wood carved skulls, and other minor curiosities and symbols of the occult, the Grove offers a few clusters of old musty smelling cabins and other older and equally moldy amenities, not unlike those you would find at any typical YMCA campground across the country.

This massive statue of Moloch the Owl, with his ever sapient eyes, overlooks the central place of “worship” and ceremony at The Grove at which 1,000s of the Most Powerful Men in the World congregate every year. This observation alone gives off a distinctly eery and oppressive enough vibe to give conspiracy theorists and other aficionados of the occult ample fodder from which to chew. These men, all Bohemian Club members of course, gather at The Grove every summer in the middle of July to celebrate the longstanding club tradition of “Midsummer High Jinks”.  These high jinks are stretched out over the course of three weekends.

With roots stretching back to the Book of Deuteronomy, Moloch represents a God in which both the Phoenicians and Canaanites associated and practiced the rather horrific ritual of Child Sacrifice. The most important part of this sacrifice is in the reading and subsequent interpretation of the no doubt gruesome facial contortions of the innocent victim child being burned in efigy to Moloch. Only after by this most ghastly and unspeakable act were they reportedly capable of reading a “Sign” or message of some importance.

While the members of the Bohemian Club do not currently burn live human babies before Moloch, they do have a curious opening ceremony that is a long standing tradition going back to the beginnings of the club and The Grove. The “Cremation of Care” is held at dusk on Saturday of the first weekend of festivities. This is the Big One, that nearly all of the Most Important Men in the World make sure they are present, but not necessarily accounted for each year.

The late afternoon merriment always begins with the substantial consumption of massive quantities of alcohol.  Pick your poison, whatever it is, rest assured that The Grove has plenty. This is actually not the sort of drinking most of these boys get around to on a regular basis. At least not the kind they would like to, and certainly not as frequently as many would like. This is good old fashioned frat boy style drinking, the kind that is customary and sanctioned at The Grove.

This is followed by an equally gluttonous feast, where numerous long tables are set with elaborate dinnerware and candles,   illuminating The Grove. After dinner, a crowd of close to 2,000 men go down and watch and even participate in the performance of the “Cremation of Care” with a nice buzz and a full belly. The ceremony starts with a bunch of “actors” which change from year to year, portraying the various roles of about 30 or so “priests”. There is a PA system, lighting, and of course professional pyrotechnics to add to the drama of the performance. Some claim that the voice of Walter Kronkite, the famous CBS news anchor, was used for the pre-recorded parts for years.

In 1996, Walter, himself a member of the club, along with fellow members President George H.W. Bush, and actor Clint Eastwood allegedly performed a little “ad-lib” side performance dressed as “native spear-throwers” and chanting a spoof based on the Budweiser beer “frog” commercial that was popular at the time. Insteading of using the lakeside frogs familiar “Bud-wise-er” chant, the three took to chanting “Cre-may-shun”, alternating the parts between the three. This was evidently a big hit with the crowd that year.

There has been a recent spat of celebrities and rap stars seemingly infatuated with the Illuminati but I assure you, greater than 99% of them are not affiliated. For instance, Justin Bieber, the former Canadian wonderboy has a recent tattoo which very much resembles the same Moloch perched in the Grove. Even though some would argue that Justin represents just the type of boy toy, femininistic image of future male masculinity that is the simple twisted ideal fate of the Illuminati, I can assure you that he is not among them. I would argue that he is like many misguided rappers who know next to nothing of what they speak and only because the Illuminati vaguely represents power and money, they have decided to use it as a new vehicle of creativity. Plus it is a cool word and rhymes with a lot of shit. NowhaImsayin?

Membership encompasses a surprisingly broad spectrum of the World, showing very little intolerence to race, color or creed. There are only two fairly strict requirements for membership 1) to be male and  2) to have money, and lots of it. It also helps to possess at least a fair amount of stature and success in a chosen field, but this is not as important a requirement as the two mentioned above.

Wesley Phillips, blog, Robbies idea to capture the sound of summer “air” on tape,  DuPont, warranties, copyrights, John Fogerty, dangerous farm equipment, Present Tense, evolution, Morgan Freeman, Mick Jagger and David Bowie, Honey Mimosa, Groupon and how it shows desperation, Get your God on, Dogs of Tour, Father McBeth’s Downtown Victors of Steel, Bakersfield folk scene- coffee shops / book stores, put up a parking lot / strip malls in Florida, cigarette breaks and the importance of a quiet moment, smoking in cold weather, obscure cigarettes, Roger’s attempts at the electric cigarette, blues musak and the way musicians listen to music, the importance of the invention of the undo button, people, AA and how people, places & things should have just been everything, rehab and the aging rock musician, Anthem to Reality (double album), Americana, Canadian Americana and Square Tires, Wayne Henderson and Roger, Wayne Henderson and Robbie, soccer, skeletons in the closet of soccer coaches, football camps for 5 year olds, applications to coach soccer / baseball, skeletons from the closet or in the closet? (greatist hits), Cheech and Chong,



With little research, but equal reason to do otherwise, I have decided I will monitor my intake of fluoride going forward. I need my third eye and can only imagine how shrunken and damaged it is from years of fluoride abuse. I note that the label on the bottle of “Dasani” water that my dad prefers here at the office only due to the rigidity of the bottle makes no mention of fluoride but does mention a “negligible amount of sodium minerals added for taste”.  I wonder if sodium fluoride is added in “negligible” concentrations?  I am surprised that the FDA would allow Coca Cola to use this word, negligible? And also not make them list the exact “sodium” minerals that are added? I know that with cosmetics, I have to list everything by “common” name AND chemical name, including any minor impurities. When you use a fragrance made up of concentrates of say rose or lily flowers, these labels can start getting long and scary sounding quick. This is stuff that is not ingested but put on your skin in most cases. The only reason I am aware these labeling requirements changed recently is because of EU regs that are much more strict than the US.  Does this seem strange?


The Problem with the Left….and Not so Much the Right.

I just watched an immature Preying Mantis use his unbelievable gift of cunning stealth to cling to a small branch in a hedge just out back of my office. I marveled at the perfect camouflage that nature provided him as he awaited patiently and nearly undetected for the arrival of his next meal. I then quickly went back to thinking about the many imperfections of the Mainstream Media as it currently stands in America.

You see, it wasn’t long ago that people didn’t think about these things at all. God bless them, it was no doubt a better world, as my parents and others of the Baby Boomer generation love to often remind us. The news was the news, and whatever the networks decided to run as a story had to be pretty good and relevant, otherwise you got up and changed the channel. Hopefully, after watching all three for a bit, you settled on one that seemed to provide the best source of information and entertainment to suit your needs.

There was of course no Internet, so it was critical to get your best men and women on the ground and make sure that they were got the “scoop” on what was going on in the World. Network news reporting was a very different world from the one we have now, indeed.

These are of course were the days when reporters consistently went out into the field and checked their stories with sources as close to the event as possible. Of course, in many cases reporters were personally responsible for ensuring that all witnesses were reliable and credible as possible. Not that this doesn’t happen now, I just have to believe that these days, much information is received and processed using the Internet and other electronic means. It is a very different World.

For many years, even decades, there was no need for a station like CBS, NBC or ABC to have any type of slogan after their name. It was simply CBS News, or ABC Nightly News, etc. It wasn’t until much later that Rupert Murdoch felt that the news as he saw it had become perverted enough that he wanted to distinguish his outfit with a catch phrase. Hence “Fox News…Fair and Balanced” was created. I’m sure this is close to the truth, I really didn’t research this at all.

The point is, until fairly recently, Americans never seemed to have any reason to believe the network news stations would ever intentionally not report on national or world news of significance.  It was assumed that this was their duty, just like the newspapers. It never occurred to most that in many cases, the papers were owned by the same corporations that owned the network news TV stations. Plus, we all know what happens when you assume. Things worked out just fine and dandy for the major networks for many, many years until the inevitable flood of technology and information came to be such that the inevitable happened and people began to ask questions that had not been asked before.

Now I will be the first one to say that Fox News is not necessarily Fair or Balanced. They are however, after looking at the alternatives, about as good an option as we American have these days. It is of course the job of the editors and others in charge of selecting which stories are important to run as headlines or at all in the “prime time” news segments. Likewise, it is also the same editors and others in charge responsibility of picking the stories that they deem not important to run. These decisions are just as critical, if not more so, as those that decide what does get on the news at 5.

It is of course much more difficult to criticize any editorial or management decision concerning news that was never reported. One has to first become aware of this news from some other source, and then go about the somewhat arduous task of finding out why it was not reported, when that decision was made, why it was made, and the toughest of all usually…..Who was responsible?

One of the problems I have encountered over and over again with Liberal friends and other acquaintances is that while many are quick to criticize Fox News sharply and even in a mean tone of spirit, few can readily cite clear examples of where they have been less than “Fair and Balanced”. There are a few, but not many, examples.

On the other hand, just in the recent months, I can honestly say that the three network news stations (ABC, CBS, and NBC) have had shockingly little coverage of what I would consider important news, worthy of prime time exposure:

1)  The emails gone missing at the IRS. The odds of not being able to recover these from a Federal Institution this size has been calculated as roughly the same as winning a Powerball sized lottery jackpot. News concerning this should be reported on nightly on all three networks, it is not.

2)  The continuing escalation of Hillary Clinton’s and the State Dept. involvement with missing evidence in the Benghazi tragedy and investigation.

3)  Obama sending Attorney General Eric Holter to Ferguson, MO to visit the family of African American Mike Brown who was fatally shot by a white police officer earlier this summer. Two days later, a similar incident happened in Salt Lake City but the officer was black and the young male victim white. Obama did not send any representatives and there is no Federal Investigation that I am aware of, unlike the case in Ferguson.

These are only recent examples, there have been many, many more over the years. The fact is, America would do well to have a news organization similar to the BBC in the UK. They report the news at home and around the world fairly accurately and succinctly, they do not have much obvious bias that seems to cause a lot of controversy, and those in charge seem to do a good job of making sure all of the important domestic and world news gets reported and is given fair treatment.


The BIG Picture

It is not all that hard to find examples of journalists, Left or Right, lauding their leadership’s accomplishments, few as these might be. Perhaps, it is the precise rarity of such accomplishment at all by Government which necessitates this phenomena?  That said, I was shocked by the seemingly utter lack of humility and most basic common sense offered in an Op-Ed piece written by Paul Krugman of the NY Times on November 4, 2012.

In comparing Mr. Krugman’s account of the “near flawless” actions of President Obama following Hurricane Sandy as opposed to the utter trainwreck that was the sole responsibility of President Bush following Hurricane Katrina, even a 7th grader, if given a couple minutes to compose his thoughts, could see at least one of the many glaring omissions.

Sometimes the Left, especially editors at very large newspaper operations, would do well to run their thoughts by a room mixed with proponents and, more importantly, opponents before publishing such nonsense in haste. Especially given the nature of how infrequently Government accomplishment, and thus the ability to report on them, arise. This is actually not a bad idea for anyone in the publishing business.

Unfortunately for Mr. Krugman, this proposed little system of “checks and balances” evidently did not happen in this case. This does not seem to matter to Mr. Krugman nor the Left. The Obama zealots seemed to really enjoy the piece regardless, and these simple, yet equally critical omissions flew right over their pea sized craniums.

Again, maybe the sheer rarity in which information arises that might lend even a hint of accomplishment at all to the work of Obama or Government in general, was reason enough for the Left to offer much praise and thanks to Mr. Krugman in the comments that follow the piece? Also note that the many warranted criticisms of the Right, which were vast and no doubt came swiftly, were seemingly absent in these comments? Could the NY Times be so brash and openly biased to have them removed?

I encourage you to read the article in the link above first and then see if you concur with what I think should be at least three elementary and obvious omissions:

  1. Krugman has no problem ignoring the fact that the residents of New Orleans, along with the rest of the Gulf Coast had at least 3 days of very serious warnings, urging most residing along the coast to evacuate. The severity of the storm was well known, yet many decided to ignore this and stayed anyway, much to their peril. In fact, New Orleans Mayor, Ray “Chocolate City” Nagin, did order the first ever mandatory evacuation of New Orleans prior to Katrina. Is this really the fault of George W. Bush?
  2. Obama had the enormous advantage of hindsight and was able to learn some valuable lessons from Katrina, which was still relatively fresh in the minds of most Americans. The mistakes that followed that tragedy were many and well known. As often happens in America, we are much better at reacting to natural or other disasters, and only start the process of initiating proactive procedures and measures after the fact.
  3.  Perhaps most important of all, Krugman believes that people should rely and depend on the Federal Government as their primary means of assistance and aid in the event of a natural or other disaster. This is obviously a very grave assumption, and even if you believe this it to be true, shouldn’t you look to your local and state branches of government first?

Rodrigo Gilmorosa

Roger Gilmorosa was born in Crescent City, California in 1942. This is about as far north as you could get along the northern California Coast without being in Oregon.  His father, Alejandro, headed a group of a dozen or so migrant workers, except that the term “migrant worker” had yet to be invented in 1942. The men were largely laborers, assisting hundreds of farmers scattered throughout California plant and harvest crops. World War II had of course created a serious shortage of manpower required to perform labor of any kind in the United States.

The crops grown in California were an essential part of the war effort, and the U.S. Government assisted farmers with funding under Roosevelt’s Bracero Program to help them offer a decent wage for the labor necessary to feed the hundreds of 1,000’s of troops stationed abroad and at home. Most of Alejandro’s crew were born in Mexico, and granted temporary visas to allow them to work, but a few were “illegals” that had been in the country for over a decade and had no interest in exploring any of the legal channels to citizenship.

Alejandro was born in San Diego, and was a proud US Citizen that spoke English very well and gravitated to this “leadership” position quite naturally. He had studied agriculture for nearly three years in the early 30’s at California State University at Chico, but lacked the time and money needed to finish his degree. The l in Gilmorosa, like most l’s in the Spanish language that are stuck somewhere after the first letter of any word, is silent so it is pronounced Ghee-more-ose-ah. As with most rules in the Spanish and English language, this is most of the time, but not every time and exceptions are plentiful.

Alejandro married his wife, Isabella Maria in 1936 and the reception took place in the basement of a small Catholic Church located on Coyamucca Avenue in Chula Vista, CA. Just as Crescent City is the northern most coastal city of California, it doesn’t take more than 15 minutes on a good day to get to the US / Mexico border crossing heading south on Highway 5 out of Chula Vista. Alejandro grew up in this neighborhood and friends and family walked the few short blocks it took to get to the church. Some that had instruments to carry, like Alejandro, decided to drive.

Alejandro played the guitarrón mexicano, which literally translates to “Mexican large guitar”. The instrument might look like a guitar, but was actually developed independently in Spain and is related to the de uña or fingernail-plucked bass.  This instrument has six large strings tuned in alternating fifths and fourths that grace a short, fretless fingerboard. Wound steel or brass is typically used for the bass strings and the higher three treble strings were constructed of nylon. It takes great strength and dexterity to facilitate the two note octave fingering used to provide the bass lines in the mariachi and other traditional Mexican music played capable of the instrument.

The bass lines in mariachi music are not unlike those found in most forms of popular music, producing an alternating “oomp” on the root or one note, followed by the responding “pah” on the following plucked fourth except these are done with two strings, one on the root and one and octave above. There was of course much more complex uses for the instrument depending on the level of intricacy. Just like American folk, jazz and even rock and roll music, Mexican folk music had variety, and could get just as simple, haunting, beautiful, or weird depending on the mood of the composer. Mexican music generally did not get as weird as American music, but there are some who would argue otherwise.

You do not see Mexican guitarrón players getting all “Jaco Pastorius” when they strap on the instrument. This is because of the short neck, high string tension, and other physical factors. It is simply beyond the design capabilities of the instrument. Just holding the thing in the proper position is awkward. It is not a melody or solo instrument, nor have there been many attempts to change this over the years despite brief attempts by overly drunk American tourists. These are usually told to “put the instrument down” in a piercing Mexican accent before much damage is done.

The guitarrón was the inspiration behind American manufacturer Ernie Ball and other manufacturer’s early attempts to make a guitar shaped acoustic bass. Why Ernie waited so long is a mystery, but the first examples started showing up in the early 1970s. They basically added a longer neck, frets, removed two strings, and tuned it in fourths like a “normal” bass. Though it was slightly more portable, this idea never really took off other than having a brief spurt of popularity during MTV’s “Unplugged” series in the early 1990s. The double, or upright bass developed centuries ago in Europe remains the only viable and acceptable acoustic bass used in almost all live and recorded music today.

Of course Roger was fascinated by the guitarrón and all the other instruments that his father’s many friends would bring to the numerous sessions he, along with young Roger, would host and attend over the years. His older brother, Miguel, had been given a soprano ukulele when he was just four years old. This is an excellent instrument for a young child, the chords are relatively simple, the strings are nylon and soft, and the scale is about as small as it gets. Roger, three years younger than Miguel, started to pick on his brother’s instrument at about the same age. He would play it any chance he could, and Miguel was never overly hostel or selfish with sharing just about everything with his younger brother. They had a surprisingly good and loving relationship even in their younger years, and this continued through their teens and into adulthood.

Alejandro decided to settle his family in Bakersfield for a few reasons, but most importantly, much of the work the family performed throughout the year was located in the orchards of the beautiful and vast southern San Joaquin Valley. Dubbed the “food basket of the world” this massively fertile valley is capable of producing nearly every variety of vegetable and fruit known to Man. The one and only resource it lacked remains vitally important.


Given sufficient quantities of this precious resource, the valley could provide more than enough fruit and vegetables to feed the entire United States population with ease, and some estimates do indeed account for the entire world.

Alejandro, along with his family and crew, chose to work the shady orchards, rather than toil in the heat of the plains and fields. Not that he was lazy or that this work was a whole lot easier. He had simply made connections early in his life and became very schooled and respected in the art of planting and harvesting peaches, tangerines, and oranges. So much so, that he became a “consultant” of sorts, and his advice and expertise where sought frequently.

Alejandro, or Alex and he became known, along with his family and crew received very little of the harsh prejudice that would befall the Okies and Arkies that had come to the Valley earlier in the twentieth century to escape deteriorating conditions on their own homesteads back east. Mainly because most of the white men of suitable age were off assisting in the war effort, but also because of Alex’s reputation. They worked hard and smart, and this was appreciated at a time when it was tough to find people to work at all.

This was much unlike the “Dust Bowl” days of only a decade ago, where cataclysmic disasters one natural and the other economic had collided to grip the entire country in the Great Depression. Work in any form was a coveted possession sought by many a proud man, young and old, color and race of little importance. The hatred displayed by the locals towards the Okies and Arkies competing for these same precious few jobs the Valley could provide at the time was somewhat understandable and expected. Besides, technically they were not disobeying the fifth Cowboy Code of Honor which states that “A cowboy is free from racial and religious intolerances.”  These Okies and Arkies were white and Christian too, so it was OK to hate them.

The differences between the Great Depression and recent Great Recession that supposedly ended in 2009 are as vast as the San Joaqin Valley itself. During the Great Recession, we did not witness unemployment approaching anything near the level of hopelessness seen during the Great Depression. There were no signs whatsoever of significant numbers of white people, young or old, forming long lines to apply for jobs involving manual labor of any kind. Manual labor in the United States, whether it be agricultural, landscaping, masonry, or the many other forms, remains largely accomplished by people of Mexican heritage and descent. This has been the case for years, and is not expected to change any time soon.

I for one have great respect for manual labor, as do most people who have performed the act in some capacity throughout their lives, no matter how briefly. It is a necessary and essential part of any successful country’s economic backbone. Most suburban white people are well aware that Mexicans are performing the bulk of these jobs, yet remain very ignorant when it comes to their culture and origins. Though many might briefly ponder if the 5 guys that show up at their house every week to perform an amazingly efficient job of cutting the grass, trimming, blowing, weed whacking, etc. might be “illegal aliens”,  few lose much sleep at night thinking about how much money they make, how many children they might have, where they came from, or where they lived. As long as it was not next door to them. Most interact only with the typically white owner or foreman of the business, and that is normally good enough.

This is not all that different than the way farmers and the few remaining rednecks living in the San Joaquin Valley in the early and mid 1940’s viewed Alex and his com padres.  They did not really understand them or know where they came from, but seeing as they seemed to be quiet, hard working people, did not feel the need to do so and generally left them alone. Most people of Mexican origin at the time and now are quiet people, who respect the privacy of others regardless of race and expect the same.  They do not frequent many of the same restaurants and other establishments of entertainment that white people frequent, nor do they feel the need to do so very much anyway. Interaction with these people, other than the occasional ones that happened in the fields, orchards and highways and byways to and fro, was rare. These would be brief and typically insignificant in nature, the language barrier not being the least of reasons.

Roger was an exception. He made a few white friends in school and his ever evolving interest in the country music that was very popular in Bakersfield at the time would encourage him to start seeking interaction with more and more like minded individuals, regardless of race or color.





Bloggin’, like the dooh, da, man…….

Well, there are many reasons why I have never started writing a blog up until now but so far, I have few regrets. Overall, it has been smooth sailing here at or, I am still not 100% sure that these are indeed one in the same. I should probably figure this all out asap and make sure I am expending all of this time and energy on the site with the best hopes of actually surviving and making it through any of the numerous disasters that can befall a website in this day and age. If they are not one in the same, one or the other has done an amazingly good job of copying the necessary code and making sure that their domain is as close as possible to a mirror image of the other. For future reference, I will make note that I am typing this current message on

I should probably figure out a way to backup this stuff regardless. In my archaic way of looking at the computer world, the only relatively easy way of doing that is to copy and paste each blog into either a word or txt file and save to my hard drive. Being early in the game, this should only take a couple of minutes, and not set me back much time or effort at all. I am sure others who have been doing this for years have easier and more sophisticated means of accomplishing a backup. I would like to learn about this, but it is not a matter that interests me much, so I will put it on the “to do list”.  Of course, my hard drive is backed up daily by, whom for the sole reason that they have enough cash to advertise on TV, is deemed acceptable and about as safe as these kinds of things come. I have never really tested this backup system, although my Dad has, and if he says it works I believe him.

Other than the minor hiccup of losing about 500 words when trying to copy the image of a vintage Ibanez guitar and pasting it to my blog, causing Google Chrome to uncharacteristically freeze, my wordpress experience has been great. The spellchecker is much better than Apple’s annoying iPhone version which auto-corrects me to madness at times, but I am not sure if that is saying much. It did not pick up on my first attempt above to spell sophisticated with an f instead of the correct ph, but that is no biggie. An “undo” button would be nice, and I am sure there is one, but I do not see it on my tool bar. If home based recording on a computer could be this intuitive, I would be light years ahead of where I want to be with that hobby. As it stands now, the simple act of recording a mandolin over a previously recorded guitar track is a very complicated and tedious process, so much so that recording anything has been on hold for over a year.

WordPress is very intuitive and user friendly, but I am surely not really asking a lot or pushing it’s capabilities. I just want to be able to type a title and content and be able to easily return to make edits when necessary. I can’t really think of much more to do with whatever you call this, maybe software or cloudware? Then again, there is likely much more of a “social networking” aspect to all of this that I have yet to discover. I am in no hurry to rush into that foray and not really concerned at all about “missing” anything.

Just about the only downside I have seen so far, besides the minor quips mentioned above, is no fault of wordpress at all. My wife has a rapidly growing distaste for this “blogging” or “writing” or whatever this might turn out to be. It has only been a little over 24 hours since I opened up the blog and she has been quick to start an argument or three ever since. In fact, this morning I went to watch my son run cross country over at Shawnee High School and returned to a few moments of peace in an empty house. She was at my daughter’s soccer game which was almost over, so I knew the quiet would not last. It never lasts for long in my house that presently includes three children (Caroline 7, Thomas 10 and Jacob 13), two adults (my wife and myself) and three cats (two newly adopted kittens and an older female).

Even though I have made it publicly and repeatedly well known to all parties concerned that I absolutely LOVE having the house to myself and all that goes along with that simple pleasure, there seems to be no coordinated effort or movement of any kind to ensure that this happens on a regular basis.  Let alone for any great amount of time on the rare occasion it does happen. My wife equally values her alone time, and absolutely LOATHES summer vacation when all three kids are home all day, every day for three months.  She looks forward to September with glee, and celebrates by buying all three of them brand new school supplies. In fact, this year, she made sure to buy them brand new EVERYTHING I guess to celebrate their relatively good behavior over the summer. There was very little recycling of items such as backpacks and lunch boxes that really should see a few good years of use in this overly disposable society in which we live.

Anyway, my quiet / alone time today lasted about 35 minutes. As soon as she walked in the door, she saw me behind the keyboard and the first thing out of her mouth was quote “You’re going to have to put whatever creative juices you got flowing over there on hold as we have plans this afternoon!” Now, as if this wasn’t nasty enough, as usual, her body language was throwing off a whole lot more negative vibes. She has never been keenly aware of the way her body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice can elicit a very negative response. It is so obvious to everyone but her yet she continues to express herself this way repeatedly.

Now, to be honest I am not the best listener and have been known to not fully understand or bother to really hear her “instructions” from the previous day. The only “plans” I had was going to Home Depot to get some weed fighting chemicals as well as some of that special “weed block” sheeting.  I did plan to spend at least an hour actually pulling weeds as well. I had not even eaten anything all day and had just fired up the oven to heat up some left over pizza. It wasn’t like I had just spent the last 4 hours blogging away. That would come later in the afternoon, when a heavy rainstorm put my weeding plans on hold.

Our relationship has been largely great recently and I have few complaints. The only thing we really fight about at all is my distaste for soccer, which is warranted, but I will reserve that for a blog of it’s own. Even the act of practicing my guitar or mandolin has been tolerated recently to an extent I never thought possible. This gives me hope. I do realize that these blogs take away my time and attention that I could be devoting to her and other things, but it is a new and exciting experience for me and seems relatively harmless.

I do have a newly found appreciation for Jack Torrence, the tormented author and lead character portrayed in the film version of Stephen King’s brilliant novel, The Shining. Even though he was typing “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” over and over again, this still seemed to require a whole lot of concentration, requiring absolute quiet and eventually isolation from any DISTRACTIONS that might interrupt his work. “Wendy,……..”


Robbie Barlow

Robbie Barlow, unlike the other members of the band, grew up a little further outside of Bakersfield, in Barstow, California. Born in 1947, he was the “baby” of the band.  His friends growing up teased him with seemingly endless nursery rhymes and silly songs inevitably starting with some variation on “Robbie Barlow, he lived in Barstow, his dick was so short we thought it would never grow.” etc.  Robbie was more than a little sensitive to this subject and not afraid to voice his irritation. This only further encouraged members of GOD to start 1,000’s of their own little riddles, rhymes and whole rock operas that continue to this very day.

The son of an Army Lieutenant, Robbie had a younger sister named Heidi who could have passed for his twin in his younger years and to a lesser extent, beyond. His boyish looks followed him into his twenties and became kind of a burden for him especially when the hippy movement got into full swing and he started wearing his hair in a long pony tail. You see, most rednecks found in the typical diners which dot the highway connecting Barstow and Bakersfield had little trouble distinguishing typical foul smelling, unshaven, long haired male hippies from actual women. Robbie’s girlish looks and lack of facial hair, however, made their jousts and name calling particularly brutal and frankly, cruel, even by redneck standards. This is likely why Robbie has elected to grow the grayish brown fuzz that now graces his high cheekbones and most of his face.  It wasn’t until his late twenties that he ever needed to shave on a regular basis.

Like most rock stars, Robbie had a somewhat troubled youth. To this day, he continues to suffer from some type of serious learning disability, likely acute dyslexia coupled with ADHD, but never properly diagnosed. Neither of these now commonplace conditions had yet to be regularly and routinely recognized in young children in the early 50’s.  Presently, Robbie would have indeed been placed in a special school and given copious amounts of strong amphetamines to treat these disorders. Unfortunately for Robbie, his father decided the proper treatment for both was to upgrade his beatings from level 8 to level 11. As expected, the results were less than positive.

Robbie’s obsession with sock-hop rock and roll started at a very young age when he first heard “Thirteen Women”, the “B” side to Bill Haley’s 1954 smash hit “(We’re Gonna) Rock Around the Clock”. Oddly enough, this was also the first incidence of rock stars thinking way too long and hard about song titles and overusing parantheses.  Add footnote [This author just thought way too long and hard about the plural of paranthesis] end footnote. Robbie almost always preferred the “B” sides to every record, a trend that would continue for the rest of his life, or at least until they stopped making records.  He would fervently try to persuade his friends, and anyone else that would listen, that the “B” side was way better.  Few would be swayed, and most took this as a good enough reason to distance themselves from Robbie.

Robbie also liked the cowboy songs broadcasted from the tiny AM radio stations located in and around Barstow and Bakersfield. As with his beloved sock-hop, the more minor chords and weirdness of the melody, the better. He liked the sadder songs too, which led him to discover the eerie old folk ballads where murdering your one and only true love was a very viable and popular option. Drowning seemed by far the most popular way to accomplish this drudgery, and was AOK with Robbie.

In 1954, Robbie’s father took him to a rodeo / carnival held in downtown Barstow where a hero to both would be making an appearance. Gene Autry, the Singing Cowboy, was still riding the slightly diminished wave of popularity he helped create along with Roy Rogers in the early 1930’s.  The fact that the rest of the country had moved on to other genres of popular music was largely ignored by the overwhelming majority of people inhabiting the 100 square miles or so of desert that surrounds and separates Bakersfield from Barstow.  As far as they were concerned, any kind of music was good, as long it contained country and / or western.

Gene Autry had one and only one publicity photo taken over his long career spanning nearly 60 some years.  Like all good Cowboys just starting out, Gene was a little cash poor and thus self sufficient. He took pride in accomplishing most tasks by himself, whenever possible.  He did not like to ask for help but was glad to offer it, especially if you happened to have a nice camera and modicum level of talent behind the lens.  He made sure that all of the important elements of his forthcoming fame would be on prompt display for this glossy 8 x 12″ black and white photograph. At the time, these included his gun, horse, guitar, and last but not least, himself.  Gene and his photographer friend Jack Delano were lucky and got it right the first time.  There was never a future need to add or remove any of the accessories featured in the shot.  One of the conditions that Robbie’s father made him agree to before enduring the nearly 90 minute wait to meet the Cowboy was to promise to memorize Gene’s legendary Cowboy Code of Honor printed in bold black ink on the back of the photograph:

  1. A cowboy never takes unfair advantage — even of an enemy.
  2. A cowboy never betrays a trust. He never goes back on his word.
  3. A cowboy always tells the truth.
  4. A cowboy is kind and gentle to small children, old folks, and animals.
  5. A cowboy is free from racial and religious intolerances.
  6. A cowboy is always helpful when someone is in trouble.
  7. A cowboy is always a good worker.
  8. A cowboy respects womanhood, his parents, and his nation’s laws.
  9. A cowboy is clean about his person in thought, word, and deed.
  10. A cowboy is a Patriot.

While it may seem that the order seems to be a bit random, it is tough to argue the insignificance of any of these principles. Not unlike the 12 Steps of AA, this code was never intended to be restricted only to Cowboys. The world would be a much nicer and better place if everyone could adopt and live by at least 3-4 of these seemingly simple precepts. Though Robbie never forgot any of them for the rest of his life, he would never be able to come close to obeying them all with any degree of precision.  As many members of AA have often observed, it is best to practice and measure progress, not perfection.

Not unlike certified junkies, change did not come often or without careful consideration at our nation’s oldest guitar making factory, C.F. Martin and Co. est. 1833.  Since their humble beginnings, and for nearly 100 years after, they made and sold guitars that were not at all very different than the one’s Christian Frederick Sr. learned how to craft working under the the esteemed Johann Stauffer in back in his native and cherished Deutschland. They did not see a need for any type of research and development department, as the motto “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” seemed to fit just fine.  Insert editor’s footnote [the actual company logo at C.F. Martin was created in 1920 and reads “Non Multa Sed Multum”.   This is of course Latin for “Not Many, But Much” or “Quality Not Quantity”.  Frank Henry Martin crafted a wooden sign using simple hand tools alone that still hangs in the factory today.] end footnote.

The only time change usually came at Martin is when a very popular and talented musician had an unmet need or an idea that has not been met by any commercially available products. Sometimes, these ideas were given to Martin’s competitors first, and in most of these cases, Martin was far too proud to simply copy and be the last one to the party.  More often than not, Martin was privy to the benefit of first advantage.  In 1929, only a few short years before the Singing Cowboys started pestering Martin about the need for bigger and thus louder guitars, a talented and popular banjo player named Perry Bechtel made a visit to the factory. Upon seeing the guitars and other fretted instruments in various stages of construction, Eddie quickly observed that it would be great to have a guitar with a longer and skinnier neck similar to a banjo. This would give him easier access to those pesky upper frets that most mortal guitarists try to avoid.

Martin thought about this, as well as their policy concerning visitors to the factory, and decided that with some relatively simple modifications, the neck on one of their 000 sized guitars could be modified and joined at the 14th versus the current 12th fret location.  Because the resulting guitar had a body that was essentially the same size as the existing 000, they did not even bother with naming it a 0000, but instead chose to call it the Orchestra Model, or OM.  Years later, these early OM models would prove to be some of the finest and most valuable guitars ever made by Martin.

Begin footnote. [I hope that the decision for this author to use the enormous benefit of hindsight and retrospect will not be used often. I will do my best to use restraint and only when I absolutely think that this tool will enhance the average reader’s experience. When the subject of guitar geekery arises, you will have to excuse my excursions into this format. This subject holds great interest to me, and the need to somehow convey this fascination and vast knowledge to the innocent reader might go beyond the bounds of good taste in more than one instance.  Please do forgive me in advance.] end footnote.

The creative juices were definately raging in the bloodstream of Gene Autry the day he named his famous horse Trigger.  These fluids were much calmer the day he decided to name his equally important large bodied guitar about to be assembled at the Martin factory.  There were a few good ideas for guitar names, including Bullet and Ranger, but in the end, Gene Autry decided to name this masterpiece of 1933 luthiery……..drum roll……..Gene Autry.

Martin, ever conservative, saw no problem with this at all and began immediately inlaying the artist’s name in large billboard sized mother of pearl script, stretching from the 12th to the 2nd fret.  While he just as well could have had a fancy new 14 fret necked OM just like Eddy Bechtel, the early Singing Cowboys had no real use for any frets below the 7th. Even those below the 5th fret were only used occasionally, and only then with a capo or “cheater” as Robbie called them. (ed. note, do I need to define capo?) end ed. note. Contrasting with their normally timid fashion, Martin decided to name this the largest guitar in their lineup the “dreadnought”.  The British had coined this phrase earlier to describe their largest and most heavily fortified battleships employed at the time. {editors note- Martin had actually made a few dreadnoughts for the Ditson company earlier in 1931, but this was the first introduction of an official “Martin” dreadnought} end note.

Continuing with tradition and at the request of Gene, Martin made this dreadnaught in the “45” style so the guitar came to be known famously as a “D-45”. For decades, a 45 grade guitar was painstakingly and lovingly adorned with pearl or abalone inlay on virtually every visible joint and right angle.  While it was tempting to inlay both sides of each of the twenty frets with a pearl border, Martin was able to use it’s ample supply of reserve and opt for hexagonal shaped wedges of pearl to identify select fret locations.  On some examples of the 45, Martin would go a little overboard and inlay a beautiful and incredibly intricate “tree of life” pattern along much of the entire fretboard.  After the introduction of these two new guitars to their catalogue, Martin was done with change for a while. It would be another 50 years or so before they would introduce a new body size to their guitar lineup.

Despite the fact that Robbie saw this autographed picture of Gene and his beautiful crustacean encrusted Martin guitar hanging on his wall nearly every day of his youth, Gene’s good taste in guitars never rubbed off on Robbie. Robbie craved to be different, and his longstanding inexplicable bad taste in guitars manifested itself early. Even with inexpensive guitars, Bobby was able to find the weirdest, rarest of them all- a 1957 honey blonde Ibanez Hi-Tone.  In reality, this Japanese import actually played and sounded better than a lot of the comparably priced Kays and Regals that other kids flocked to back in the day.  The action was high, like cheese grater high, and the tones emitted by the lone single Guyatone made (another odd Spanish sounding name coming out of Japan) pickup were limited, but more than sufficient.

Robbie, like many boys his age in late 1950’s Merica, was eager to get his first electric guitar, but not quite as keen to pick up the necessary books and instructional materials necessary to facilitate a proper education on the basics of Guitar 101.  Robbie thought that all the strings should be tuned to the same note, and was lucky that he chose the key of A as most of the gauges would accommodate this rather primitive tuning style.  Robbie of course could not have known at the time that if he had selected the key of G, he might have been well on his way to learning the early blues styling used by virtuosos like the Reverend Gary Davis and Leadbelly.

Ibanez was kind of a strange name for a Japanese guitar making company to seemingly randomly select upon opening in 1956, but really not that strange. I have always chosen to pronounced this as “I bin ez” just like it reads, and only recently had to question that decision.  Without getting too much into the subject of Spanish and the use of phonetics (we will no doubt touch on this in detail when we get to the story of Roger Gilmorosa), if the Philadelphia Phillies had not picked up a player named Raul Ibanez (pronounced EE bahn yez) I would have happily gone on to never question this decision at all.

To prove just how rare and strange the Ibanez Hi-Tone is, the Gods of all things Strange decided to crash my minty, clean as a Virgin, never seen much time on the internet at all thus should be relatively corruption free, Lenovo Z570 laptop computer when browsing and finally finding an image of this vintage piece of kit. Even the Lenovo’s “Enhanced Experience v 2.0” was not enough to combat this savage attack.  I am of course accessing WordPress through the most updated version of Google Chrome, a browser and internet platform that is new to me, but supposedly solid and reliable. My father insisted that I finally give up on Internet Explorer and all of the quirks that come along with that experience in favor of Chrome.

If you think about it, Microsoft had a pretty good run. Their products are the only successful example I can think of where consumers will tolerate a product that needs to be turned off using any number of increasingly complex algorithms in the hopes that when it is restored to power, all will be well. Not only that, but if it crashes and burns, and they do crash and burn in a very fatal way all day long, every day, 8 out of 10 consumers will simply shrug it off as being “just the way it is” and go run out and buy another PC.  Wordpress seems to be a pretty good experience so far, but I have only been using it for two days and have yet to explore less than 1% of it’s features. I had assumed that it was autosaving everything I typed in real time, but you know what they say about assumptions. I will not repeat that mistake, hopefully.  Sorry for that sidetrack, back to Robbie and his cheap weird guitar……

Robbie also could not have known at the time that this purchase would be the beginning of a relationship with Ibanez that would last a good length of his professional career.  Robbie would have been wise to hold onto this first guitar of his, but alas, he lost it long ago under circumstances that remain foggy to this day. For one, Ibanez really wanted the original so that they could measure the exact dimensions and electrical specifications for a Robbie Barlow signature model. Instead, they had to make some educated guesses based on the few existing photographs of Robbie and the guitar.  Secondly, due largely to Robbie and their rarity, original examples of a honey blonde, single pickup Ibanez Hi-Tone guitars have become valuable collectors items fetching real money when they come up for auction on Ebay.  Lastly, this is the only guitar that Robbie gets a little sentimental about and seems to miss terribly.

Neither Robbie, nor any of the other members of GOD, were astute in realizing the potential future collectible value of the many, many instruments that would pass through their hands over the years.  For instance, Robbie had a chance in the mid-60’s to purchase an original 1937 Martin D-45 guitar very similar to the one owned by his childhood hero for the very reasonable sum of $300. This was a little too rich for Robbie at the time. This guitar today, even in moderately poor condition, could easily fetch over $100,000.  Instead, Robbie purchased a new Burns Bison imported from England. A guitar that only ended up holding his interest for a few months before he ended up giving it to one of the road crew.  This was then, like many of these “gifts” would be over time, quickly swapped for whatever drugs of lesser value materialized first. This would not be the last example of Robbie and other members of GOD missing out on opportunity.